When Twitter made the surprise announcement on Thursday that the company would be shutting down its video sharing platform Vine “in the coming months,” it only seemed natural that we should take a look at the Vines that rival anything Scorsese or Spielberg could craft; the flawless mise en scene, the moving narratives and comedy at a depth we’d never before witnessed and, evidently, never will again.
So, here are the absolutely official, completely objective, not biased at all, definitive list of Vines for your viewing pleasure.
Duck Army: A classic cacophony of rubber ducks, that is initially terrorizing and then pure symphony.
Birdyoncé: Rivalling the Queen B herself, the effortless grace and natural dance ability in this bird is astounding, with claws perfectly pointed.
Bobby Flay: From master chef to master of the dance floor in his own mind, the true star of this Vine is the woman who smoothly swerves the second she sees his dad moves comes to the surface.
Savage, indeed: With the gusto and passion of Katharine Hepburn, this young tot proves she knows the true poison of life — not love, but water.
When you’re at the game with your side dude and realize you’re on TV: This silent romantic film of a Vine is easily the coldest story ever told, evoking not only a great and modern longing but subtle fear.
Who is she?: A star.
#soaring: Someone call Mel Gibson, we’ve got the real passion of the Christ right here.
You’re the dawg now dog: Never change, pup.
Ryan Gosling hates cereal: Ryan Gosling’s distate for cereal knows no bounds.
THE VINE: ‘Nuff said.
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